Okay, Stephen King rocks my world. Check out this auction for the First Amendment Project. The basic premise is you can bid for your name (or name of your choosing) to be used in an upcoming publication by one of several authors. Each author has set up his/her restrictions and explanations of how the name will be used, but King's is the best:

"What he's offering:
"'One (and only one) character name in a novel called CELL, which is now in work and which will appear in either 2006 or 2007. Buyer should be aware that CELL is a violent piece of work, which comes complete with zombies set in motion by bad cell phone signals that destroy the human brain. Like cheap whiskey, it's very nasty and extremely satisfying. Character can be male or female, but a buyer who wants to die must in this case be female. In any case, I'll require physical description of auction winner, including any nickname (can be made up, I don't give a rip).'"  [Emphasis mine]

Isn't he just the coolest guy? I'd bid on the opportunity to be in Dave Egger's book since we were friends in college, but I'd feel sychophantic and weird about it. Also, I don't really have the cash to burn.

If you do, though, check out where 100% of the proceeds go. (I wonder if that means eBay donates the fees?)

["Fallen," Sarah McLachlan